The story written by Alexandre Dumas, The Count of Monte Cristo’s main character is Edmond Dantes who transformed from a sailor to the Count. The transformation of the character was crystallized in The Chateau Prison. In comparison, there are married couples in the Pentecostal church that are sleeping in separate bedrooms and have become roommates, which is a prison onto itself. I pray this article will transform this type of marriage into a wedded bliss.
Christian Intimacy Tips
Marital couples who are not connected in the marital bedroom are imprisoned in the worst way. Individuals wait, fast and pray to get married. Once they tie the knot sometimes the relationship comes to a standstill. A sexual revolution needs to happen in the church. We need to acknowledge the problem in order to resolve the dynamics of how using sex as a weapon is damaging marriages.
The only way to correct issues surrounding the lack of sex in the marital bedroom is the practice of “doing it well”– begetting, if you will, over and over again. Yes church going or religious, married couples, why are we using sex as a weapon to hurt our spouses? Why are we utilizing something so beautiful and making it a curse? We know something is going wrong in the church due to the many sexual scandals that we hear about.
Is it possible that married men and woman are committing adultery because there is nothing going on at home? In addition, many say that the marital bedroom has become boring. How long can we keep doing the missionary position? The Lord gave the ministry of the bedroom to married couples. This is in the text when God said to be fruitful, multiply and replenish the earth. Yes, this is what God said; sounds like a command, married couples, so let’s get with it!
As to men, please stop being lazy. Your wives hold positions such as being on the missionary board but your wife also is a woman and she has NEEDS! She desires that you meet her needs. All of the hollering, sweating and dancing in church is giving your wife the libido of an 18-year-old and here you are closing her matrix because you are tired. Hmmm. You were not exhausted when playing video games all last night or watching the game until late. Yet, when it comes to the satisfaction of your wives’ needs, there seems to be a slack.
Women – and this includes first ladies – you see that your husband has given out so much virtue and you are aware that he needs replenishing after he preaches but his needs go unnoticed and his rejuvenation unfulfilled, yet you make sure that your weave and nails are done. Ensure your husband is secure and well laid.
In my book Married Couples Thou Shalt Have Great Sex, I spell out why so many couples are frustrated. If we can be in the overflow of prosperity, can we also overflow in our relationships and in the marital bedroom? Yes we can! Wake up church. We have to take back what God has given us. The marital bed is undefiled. This does not mean waiting when the mood hits, but its constantly chasing one another on a regular basis with Loving Kindness. The Bible does mention “submitting yourself one to another”. Let go of the pain from the past.
Madam and Sir, there is a healing that needs to happen in your personal bedrooms. It is time to convert your martial bedroom from iceboxes into hot flames of love. Intimacy is for healing not hurting.
The take a ways are simple:
· Identify if you have moved into the “roommate ideology”
· Come to a conclusion that you will make intimacy a priority
· Remain faithful to the process and don’t let nothing stop or hinder you well
Until next time…
T. Charles Brantley, Ph.D is a Christian counselor, relationship expert, and author of 22 nationally published books. For more information, follow Dr. Brantley at Facebook.com/Strong.Marriages and visit DrTCBrantley.com.